Zzzzz

I am really struggling to keep to a schedule. I have decided that I need a keeper. A Patti Keeper. Kinda like a zoo keeper without the zoo. I think that a taser will be crucial to my success. I like the idea of a midget. So, if you know of a midget zoo keeper armed with a taser who is willing to work for no pay please, send them my way.

I have resolved my insomnia in-so-far as the bipolar is concerned. That was step one. I am no longer staying awake for 24-48 hours at a stretch. A sleep study of me was conducted on 10/28/06. I will be receiving new equipment on 11/07/06. This should resolve my sleep disturbances (SD). What is an SD you ask? Anytime you wake up at night for whatever reason. Typically I wake up to pee. This is related to sleep apnea which will be resolved next week. Sleep apnea causes me to stop breathing in my sleep. A rush of adrenaline forces me into consciousness. The adrenaline also increases the need to urinate. Don't ask me why, I forget. The lithium I take is a diuretic. More pee. So, I wake up go to the bathroom, lay back down and have trouble getting back to sleep. A typical Patti SD. It is recommended not to stay in bed if it takes you more than 30 minutes to fall asleep. I have an SD 2-3 times a night on average. So I get back up, drink some Sleepytime tea (yeah, I know...more pee) and try to bore myself. That is difficult as I am extremely interesting. Fascinating really. Out of the ordinary. Mesmerizing. You see my dilemma.

So here is my plan.

At 5:30am my Patti Keeper will wake me up. Zzzzz.

I will eat breakfast, feed Hulda, Simon and Monkey. Take my meds, get dressed and ready for work.
Around 6:30-7:00 I will wake Tom. No taser. Well, probably no taser.
An hour after my breakfast I will drink orange juice, take my iron and vitamin C. About 7:40 I will leave for work.

If I get off track. Zzzzz.

At noon I will go home, let the dogs out (and back in), feed myself and take more meds. Then around 12:40 I will return to work.

If I get off track. Zzzzz.

When I return home I will let the dogs out and start dinner. While dinner is cooking I will feed the dogs and Simon. I will have eaten dinner by 6:30. Eating early is conducive to sleep.

If I get off track. Zzzzz.

Between 6:30 and 8:30 I will do tiring work around the house. Exercise a few hours before bed is conducive to sleep. I will take more meds. Tom will get home and we'll talk about our day and our plans for world domination. I will play with the dogs. I will probably watch TV and blog.

If I get off track. Zzzzz.

At 8:30 I will light the essential oil diffuser beside my bed. Essential oils are conducive to sleep.

If I get off track. Zzzzz.

Between 8:30 and 9:15 I will take a scalding hot bath scented with lavender essential oil and drink a cup of Sleepytime tea. A hot bath is conducive to sleep.

If I get off track. Zzzzz.

Between 9:15 and 10:00 I will watch TV with Tom and discuss our plans. I will play with the dogs and drink a cup of Sleepytime tea. Sleepytime tea is conducive to sleep.

If I get off track. Zzzzz.

At 10:00 I will put up Monkey, kiss Tom goodnight and go to bed. I will take sleep meds. I will be pleasantly relaxed by the aroma from the diffuser. I will turn on my relaxing Ocean Waves CD. I will read my book on sleep. Relaxation music and tedious reading are conducive to sleep.

If I get off track. Zzzzz.

At 10:30 it is lights out. Darkness is conducive to sleep.

If I get off track. Zzzzz.

Flawless, don't you think? I am sure there are things I must do that I left out but then that is why I have the midget. Zzzzz.

So, just send that little fellow my way and I'll be set.
Much appreciated.

Zzzzz.